Saturday, January 15, 2011

Thank you Major Dad

Several months ago I sent out a scientific survey to many of you. This missive was to determine once and for all the most iconic (thank Major Galan) song of the 1990s. As most of you know this decade was the apogee of music, everything since has been derivative tripe. Sadly what none of you knew was that this was not in fact a survey but a test, and you all failed. I'm very disappointed in you.

The correct answer is that there are four iconic songs of the 1990s. One from each of the major genres of music.

For the greatest genre of music in the 1990's--alternative--we have Beck's "Loser". Yes, "Smell's Like Teen Spirit" won the popular vote in my survey/test but this, like America, is not a true democracy. Beck won the electoral college vote (now you know the anger and disappoint I felt in 2000. Eight years of "President" Bush, damn you retired liberal-Jewish Buchanan supporters).

For those of us who couldn't quite say goodbye to our 1980s style mullets fear not, for the iconic Metal/Rock song of the 1990s was none other then the ever terrifying Metallica with the creepiest bedtime prayer in their anthem Enter Sandman. Please note this video finished second in our "holy cow that's the scarriest video I've ever seen" to Black Hole Sun. The melty faces were so scary.

Now for the first time here on this blog, and not for the last says Wife. We'll include a previously ignored branch of music and give it it's full credit. Country music didn't completely, totally suck in the 1990s. It just mostly sucked. And coming in with the least sucky country song of the decade (and thus the genre's most iconic song) we have Garth Brooks, "Friends in Low Places." I'd link the video but I just can't bring myself to do it.

Lastly, representing Hip-hop we have Sir Mix-a-Lot's ode to the gleuteously enhanced, "Baby Got Back". "36-26-36, yeah if she's 5'3" indeed sir. I salute you.

So that's it. Those are the most iconic songs of the decade. There is no argument. So don't bother trying to nay say me. Thus sayeth the First.

Now coolest video of the decade...well that's easy. IT'S SABOTAGE!!!!

For the record this is better if you watch the videos on the blog and don't just poke around on Facebook. Blogging is so 2000s.


Jon and Chelle said...

Good ol' 90's music. Don't get me wrong, I love me some Lady Gaga, but listening to Beastie Boys, Alanis Morissette, Fiona Apple, Green Day, Weezer, No Doubt, Sublime and Nirvana is really where it's at. At least in my non democratic democracy =)

John, Megan and girls said...

I can't believe I've gone my whole life without seeing the Sabotage video, thank you for opening my eyes to a truly awesome experience. I was too afraid to check out the Metallica video, definitely not my bag. I guess I'm glad I never answered the survey to begin with so I didn't fail in your "democracy".