Monday, January 21, 2008

Resolutions

Wife here. So I'm not really into making New Year's Resolutions. Maybe because I believe it when people tell me that I'm fine just the way I am. Or maybe because I got tired of forgetting about them until the following New Year's Eve. Either way I don't really make them and when I do I try to keep it small. Like this year my goals are to learn to make corn tortillas (maybe then my Mexican mother-in-law will love me) and to finish school (or at least the degree on which I am currently working). I also gave up soda effective January 1, 2008 but that is less a resolution and more a bet I have with a coworker.
But I have come up with some resolutions that I want to keep for the rest of my life. I figure that if I can avoid these things then I will pass along at least a decent legacy to whomever or whatever I leave behind.

1. I want to never get to the point where I wear sweatpants in public.
2. I want my children's' paternity to never be in question, a la Anna Nicole Smith.
3. I want to never have my butt on the evening news when they are talking about the obesity epidemic. You know, the news stories where you only ever see people's backsides and never their faces because if they knew you were taping them, they would rip the camera out of the camera man's hands and eat his face.

13 comments:

dastew said...

mmmm face.

La Yen said...

Having children and your first resolution are mutually exclusive. Because there will come a point when you MUST LEAVE THE HOUSE and if you go change your clothes they will catch you and beg to accompany you. Or there will be poop/barf/poopybarf all over everything else. So just invest in a cute sweat suit or pajamas that don't look too trashy-just in case.

Also, you live in upstate New York; who are you trying to impress? The Canadians?

La Yen said...

Doesn't look too trashy. I am tired.

Alissa said...

i have to agree... go buy yourself a cute velour pantsuit now... because when your child has to be at school 15 minutes after you woke up... changing your clothes is really the last thing on your mind.

Wife of dastew said...

Maybe some of you have forgotten, but our kids won't be like that. I'll be able to do my hair and put my makeup on everyday while the kid is quietly not making a mess. I will be well rested at all times because the child, and myself will each be getting 9 hours of sleep each night. My kids will only poop in their diapers or the toilet and they will NEVER barf. Now that that's out of the way, I no longer need a cute sweatsuit. (husband, back me up on this)

dastew said...

mmmm sweatsuit

Jon & Chelle said...

Oh good, in that case your kids can hang out with our kids. Our kids won't be allowed to hang out with anyone that barfs, because that's just nasty. Once fuzz barfed, and Tinkerbelle cleaned it up for me. Good girl Tinkerbelle.

Coops said...

Sweatpants (or as I would call them 'tracky bottoms') are perfectly acceptable in public if you are doing sport - that's it though - as for Alissa's suggestion of 'velour', that would be a serious fashion faux pas in the UK, that is what 'Chavs' or 'WAGS' wear (if you need a definition just google it, and you will see why you don't want to be associated with either group) - either way NEVER visit us with a pair, or we will just leave you locked in the house!

As for #2 no comment - at least not a safe one ;)

#3 - I have heard you mention this one before - hence there may be a need to break number one to get back in shape after #2 has arrived!

Ethan's Mom said...

These are good! As for the first one, you can avoid it by not owning sweatpants. Yoga pants are just as comfy and much cuter!

Summer said...

Unfortunately reality settles into all of us, and it's not as pretty as one would want. I concur with the yoga pants vs. sweat pants. They are much more flattering no matter how big your butt is, so if it does end up on the evening news...at least it will be the cutest one!

Roy @ CNM said...

Nice. My opinion of resoutions is that if you set your sights low enough you're bound to succeed. That said, sweats ae fine in public as long a you wear a hat and don't shave. And, by "public," I mean "Wal-Mart." At night. That's okay.

Mr Jo Bloggity said...

You're dark. And scary.

The cats must be controlling you now.

Coops said...

I have just been in the town centre in my 'sweatpants' - and as a result of this post felt self conscious in them for the first time ever! THANKS!