Wednesday, November 21, 2007

Eatin' Da Haggis

So my Scottish ancestors were a bunch of skirt wearing, sheep loving, guerrilla fighters. I'm not ashamed to admit that. They were poor people who eked a miserable existence about a cold unforgiving land. As with all poor people they ate what was available.

Now if you don't believe that this is true let me tell you something of some of the things I've eaten in my poorer days:
1. College: The Freshmen Year---I subsisted on spaghetti and "red sauce". The red sauce was an old can of prego to which I kept adding a bit of water and some crushed red pepper (this gave it flavor when it was little more than water and Red #5).
2. Mission: Cergy-Pontoise---Cockroaches mostly. Well okay we didn't purposely eat them but the apartment was so infested that I'm sure I consumed my fair share.
3. Childhood: Yes it's out of order but it's the most traumatic---My pet rabbits. That's right I ate bigwig. I also ate Wilbur, Peter Rabbit, Tom Turkey, and George the cow (that wasn't a fictional character, that's actually what we named the cow....best tasting cow ever).
My point is that you eat what you have around. That's the only excuse for people eating things like pork rinds, liver, and worst of all asparagus. Thus it's no surprise that my ancestors decided to boil a sheep's stomach (make sure the wind pipe is dangling out of the pot to let out impurities). Then chop up the kidneys, liver, and other internal organs and stuff them in the aforementioned stomach. I mean that makes perfect sense to me.

So when my dear friend Jen sent me a gummy haggis. You can imagine my joy. Not only would I get to eat the food of my ancestors, but I'd be able to do so in the fifth major food group, gummy. (I also loved the Nihlist gum, no flavor at all. It's horribly wonderful).

And so my dear Scottish friend Ian and I opened the package with all the glee and joy that our collectively nearly pure blood lines could express.

This was to be the culminating event of a rather fun party at the home of UsAndCats, though the cats surprisingly were absent (probably because of the people). The haggis looked to be the color I always imagined it.
Our very Anglo-Nordic friend Doug decided to join us in this rite of passage.




How could it go wrong.....





Well given my facial reaction you can begin to guess. What you don't see is me running to the trash to spit the whole thing out. I guess what we learn is that there's a reason that the Scots also invented Scotch.

Yet still the wives tried it...I think that's the best part of the whole thing.

(And yes that is pure hate shooting out of Wife's eyes at me).

Now for another video. Sorry to get you with two posts in one night, but I felt bad for neglecting my readership. I blame John for it. Stupid Facebook.

10 comments:

Coops said...

You ate a lot of you pets groing up - that is kind of cannibalistic! I worry for the future safety of your cats now, do you have food storage - or if you get a proper winter this year and you get snowed in, will you resort to eating Lily and Max like you did with your childhood friends!? No wonder they kept out of the way at your dinner party!

Mr Jo Bloggity said...

Have I ever told you that I ate Haggis when I went to Scotland.

And I don't even have a Scottish heritage!

m3ng said...

It is rather disconcerting to know you're eating your pets...

Kendra Leigh said...

Who says you don't have a lot of friends? I think that WE'RE the ones who are lacking in the friend department... can you come down and play with us?

dastew said...

I'm not sure you never gave me rights to read your blog Kendra...so I'll I know is what Wife tells me....it's sad.

Roy @ CNM said...

Carolyn looks as if she's going to punch you. Do you get that a lot?

Kendra Leigh said...

i need your email to send you an invite... but you're not missing out on a whole lot- i haven't posted in quite a while...

John and Megan said...

Wow, that really did seem disgusting. I'd take the Nihlist gum over that any day. And Carolyn, wow, you ate it and it's not even your heritage. That's love. Or something.

Jon & Chelle said...

yeah that was a disgusting blog.

dastew said...

For the record the haggis was butterscotch flavored, but it was a lot of fun making you think it was haggis flavored.